The Weekend

Yes, time to get drunk and naked and party like a rock star.  Actually, I’ll wait to do that tomorrow night.  It’s not so much a Friday night tradition as it is a Saturday one.

Seriously though, the weekends are a killer for me.  I tend to overeat at any opportunity.  This weekend I’ll try to focus on smarter choices. 

My dog’s looking fat.  Canadian winters, coupled with a lazy owner, will do that to a dog.  No excuses this weekend, though, as the forecast is above freezing right through until at least Monday.  Guess I have little excuse – I’ll have Angus out for longer, more frequent strolls – mark my words.

Gotta go now – I’m still at work and my boss is circling like a hawk – so have a great weekend everyone!

Choices

Here in Ontario, Canada, you’re required to have your vehicle checked every few years to make sure it passes emmission requirements.  It’s the law – and a tax grab – but I digress. The gov’t asks you to bend over and grab your ankles, and if you want to drive, you smile and take it like a man.  So I went to the garage at lunch and got the dirty deed dealt with.  Oh yes, it passed, by the way.  $36 later I was on my way.

So on the way back to the office, I’m feeling the hunger.  My gut is rumbling more than the dump truck in front of me.  So like a robot, I steer into China King, an all-you-can-stomach buffet place.   As I was parking, and looking in the glovebox for a bib to wear, it hit me.  What a horrible choice I was about to make.  I actually trembled for about 10 seconds or so, with hands glued to the steering wheel, pondering if I should get out and go stuff my pie-hole.  Finally, common sense won, and off I went to the local Pita Pit for a souvlaki wrap on whole wheat.  I washed it down with a diet cola.  It wasn’t the chicken-fried rice covered in sweet-and-sour sauce, but it was the right choice to make.

I’ve always read that it’s all about choices.  Making the right ones are tough, and it looks like I won the latest battle in what will be an all-out war. And it saved me from wearing a bib and embarrassingly pulling my chair right up to the chinese buffet table.

Maybe it’s those small things that get you through the transformation journey, I don’t know.  If so, I’m on the road to recovery, one small step at a time.

Thanks for reading…

Shame

Shame.  What a word.  Powerful to read, especially when it hits so close to home.

I came across the word SHAME this morning when I was browsing back to the start of Fat Daddy’s transformation at Fat Daddy Rants.  He mentioned how he felt/feels shame at being so fat.  Boom, it hit me like a brick. 

Shame pretty much sums up everything about my many attempts at weight loss, and how embarrassed I feel for my wife and kids when they see me the way I am - it’s gotta be tough to have a dad/husband so obese.  Yeah, I know they love me lots, but still…  And even worse, they know that I’m slowly killing myself through self-sabotage.

Special thanks goes to Fat Daddy Rants, even though he doesn’t know it.  I spent a couple hours reading his posts, and stopping to think how his life was so similar to mine.  Same lifestyle, same age, same weight, same family background…  I gotta admit, I was in tears numerous times, and chuckling others.  Quite the journey, and it’s inspirational motivation in knowing it can be done.  He’s found a way to lose weight, find health, and stick with it.  I just hope and pray that I can get back at it and do the same.

By the way, I quickly editted my links list.  It’s not meant as a slight that I’ve taken most of my links off – I still follow a ton of blogs – but I just linked to the most inspirational blogs of guys just like me that I could find.  These guys truly have done amazing things.  They were just the handful off the top of my head – I’ll add more in the next few days.

So I’m back, doing what I’ve done numerous times before – starting fresh.  Shame is what’s leading the bandwagon this time around, at least to start.  Pride is what I hope to find in some success in this transformational journey.

Let Them Eat Cake

My wife headed off to her mother’s birthday party last night.  Of course I was dreading going to mother-in-law’s celebration at an Italian restaurant, so when one of our kids was feeling lousy, it saved me being faced with loads of fattening food choices - I got to stay home and play nurse, and eat clean.

But what to my wondering eyes should appear upon wife’s arrival home, but a giant slab of cake, with loads of cream cheese icing on the top and sides.  Mmmm.

So I topped off a good day of healthy eating with a big piece of birthday cake.  And I mean BIG. After all was said and done, I still can’t believe:

1. My mother-in-law offered to send home decadent cake knowing I’m struggling to eat healthy
2. My wife actually brought it home, knowing I’m eating healthy, and
3. I actually succumbed to the wonderful taste of that evil food.

I guess if anyone is to blame for the poor choice, it’s ultimately me.  Nobody made me eat it.  But it’s more fun to blame my wife and her mother any chance I can…

Next time I’ll make a much better choice.  I’ll lock my wife out of the house!

Goal of the Day…

I have 4 litres of water on my desk and 7 hours of work.  I’ll finish the water, and flush the cake out of my system.

Friday Funny…

When an applicant asked if the company had a fitness program, the human resources manager replied, “Oh, our employees don’t need one. ..

They are routinely jumping to conclusions, flying off the handle, beating around the bush, running down the boss, going around in circles, dragging their feet, dodging responsibility, passing the buck, climbing the ladder, wading through paper work, pulling strings, throwing their weight around, stretching the truth, bending the rules, stabbing others in their backs and pushing their luck!”